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Survive A DUI

How to get through getting a DUI - both mentally, and legally.

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Guest Post: Preparing for Court -  Surviving your DUI Court date

Max Frizalone of the Frizwoods Group reached out to me and offered some insights on how to prepare for court. Personally one of the big advantages of hiring a lawyer was having to avoid all this (although in my case they messed it up), but since some people opt not to hire one, or are in a position to where they may have to appear, I thought this would be a valuable article. - Tom


Preparing for Court -  Surviving your DUI Court date


If you are required to appear in court, especially as a defendant in a DUI case, you must dress and behave appropriately. Although this seems simple for lawyers, attire can be a point of stress for many Defendants. I’ve written this article as a day-of-court guide for anyone who might be unfamiliar with what to wear for their case. The basic rule of thumb is dress to impress.

In other words, you must present yourself in a way that makes the best possible impression on the judge, the prosecution, and the jury (if applicable). All of these people will have an impact on the outcome of your case, and they will—rightly or wrongly—judge you based on your appearance and behavior in court. 

Therefore, understanding how to present yourself in court is a must if you want to increase your odds of a successful outcome in your criminal case. In this article, we discuss how to prepare for court for a DUI case. 

The Science of First Impressions


Studies have shown that a person forms a first impression of another person within seconds of meeting. According to research in the field of neuroscience, the human tendency to judge others based on first impressions is hard-wired into our brains. In other words, it is our natural instinct as human beings to make snap judgments about others.

 So, it’s easy to see how this can affect you as a criminal defendant in court. Judges, juries, and prosecutors are driven by the same human instincts as everyone else, and their first impressions of you can have a huge impact on the outcome of your case. Therefore, as a criminal defendant, it is imperative that you do everything you can to make an excellent first impression when appearing in court. As unfair as it may seem, your appearance and behavior in court can have a huge effect on the outcome of your case. 

What to Wear


The first thing that the judge, prosecutor, and jury will notice about you when you enter the courtroom is your appearance. Therefore, you must dress in a manner that makes a great impression on the people who will have an impact on your case. For men, best practices would be to wear:
  • A clean suit or a sport coat and dress pants
  • Conservative dress shoes 
  • Matching dress socks
  • A solid-colored shirt with a collar
  • A solid-colored tie.

And for women, appropriate dress in court means:

  • A dress blouse
  • A professional skirt or dress pants 
  • Conservative dress shoes, such as low-heel pumps or flats
These outfits are just recommendations. In the post modern world of 2022, I do not presume to tell someone they must wear a certain outfit, or need to dress according to their gender. Similarly, a Judge won’t necessarily admit to treating someone different based on their dress. And honestly, I truly believe that they wouldn’t do so consciously. Having said that, the subconscious isn’t well understood but is generally accepted to drive some of our decision making. I try not to leave things to chance, so dressing for business is a safe bet. 

 In my career as a Public servant (on both sides of a Court room) I have seen nearly every bad outfit that a person can wear to Court. Everything from F@!* the Police shirts, to shirts that are barely there. I can honestly say that those people were taken less seriously. In a room where your credibility might be the difference between jail and a probation, it’s important to play it safe. 

Additional Attire Tips



Don’t dress casually:


As noted above, you shouldn’t dress casually in court. Court is a business-like environment. If you dress casually, the people who will affect the outcome of your case may assume that you aren’t taking the matter seriously, and this isn’t a good thing. No matter what you think about the criminal charges against you, you must demonstrate that you are respectful of the legal process—and this starts with your appearance.

Avoid flashy or overly formal clothing:


Although you shouldn’t dress casually in court, you also should avoid wearing flashy or overly formal clothing, as this may also paint you in a bad light. For example, court isn’t the place to wear a tuxedo or evening gown. In addition, you should avoid clothes with bright colors or flashy patterns. 

Avoid anything controversial:


Finally, you should avoid wearing clothing that may be seen as controversial, such as clothes that display political or social statements. You have no way of knowing how the judge, prosecutor, or jury may react to such statements, so it is best to avoid them altogether. 

Grooming Tips


In addition to wearing the proper clothing to court, you should ensure that you are well-groomed and present a neat, clean, appearance. This includes:  
  • Styling your hair in a conservative, neat fashion
  • Avoiding wet, dirty, or messy hair. You don’t want to look like you’ve just woken up. 
  • Scheduling a haircut one or two weeks before your court date.
  • Keeping your nails neat, clean, and trimmed
  • For women, using neutral or conservative nail polish
  • For men, being clean-shaven or having a neatly trimmed beard.

Cover Tattoos and Non-Traditional Piercings

Tattoos and piercings are widespread and common today. Unfortunately, despite their prevalence, negative connotations associated with tattoos and certain types of piercings still exist, especially in areas that tend to be more socially conservative. 

And although this certainly isn’t true across the board, many judges and jurors hold traditional views on tattoos and piercings. Therefore, you should err on the side of caution when it comes to displaying your tattoos and body piercings in court. In other words, if possible, you should cover your tattoos and remove all non-traditional piercings before appearing in the courtroom. 

Unfortunately there are certain tattoos that cannot be easily covered. I have personally been involved in cases with facial tattoos that were covered by makeup. While it was challenging, it was important to attempt to cover these tattoos based on the subconscious negative associations that jurors and judges might hold against a client or witness.

Although, as a criminal defendant, you probably won’t have the opportunity to speak often in court (your attorney will likely encourage you to exercise your constitutional right to remain silent), when you do have a chance to speak, you should do so respectfully. For example, when dealing directly with the judge in your case, you should use a respectful tone of voice and always address him or her as “your honor.” In addition, you should avoid using slang terminology and other language that may give the judge and jury the impression you aren’t taking the legal process seriously.  

There are certain points in every case where I discuss having my client give an impact statement before their sentence (if they are found guilty). I always ask my clients to prepare the statement in advance as it is necessary to make a few edits. Additionally, I always ask my clients not to criticize the State’s case, unless we’ve lost a contested trial. There’s nothing worse then entering a guilty plea and then arguing with the Judge that you weren’t guilty, or the police lied. If those things are in fact true, then it would be best to hash it out at a trial. 

Presenting yourself in an appropriate manner while in court is a necessary component of a solid defense. However, there is much more to successfully fighting DUI charges than simply looking nice and behaving respectfully. To give yourself the best chance of success in your criminal case, you need an experienced criminal defense attorney on your side. Look to an attorney's reputation in the community and speak with them before paying any money. 

Best of luck with your Court date, you’re going to be A-O-K.

On Probation

On Probation

Hi everyone. Been a while, I know. Truth of the matter is that once you’re sentenced, you’ve done your classes, gotten rid of your interlock, got your license back, life continues where you left off. Sure, your insurance is still high, but there’s an end in sight.

You might not believe this, but there comes a time when you hardly even think about your DUI.

It’s a good feeling. It’s a weird feeling.

Probation in CA lasts for three years. Throughout my journey with the DUI I kept getting different answers as to when it started. In my final assessment, my DUI class instructor told me that it started from the date of arrest. That made me feel better. It did not turn out to be the case. You’re on probation as soon as you get arrested, but it doesn’t count towards your probation. Would’ve been nice if it did, but, alas, it’s just how things go.

My lawyer told me it would start from the day I was sentenced. This seemed to make sense, but this, too, wasn’t quite the case. One day a few weeks ago, I decided to call up the DMV and double check (always a good idea) to make sure that my probation had passed like it should have. It did. Just my last day of probation was a month and a half later than I had calculated.

No idea why, and there’s really nothing I could’ve done about it. Can you imagine calling the DMV, “Hi, while I didn’t violate my probation, can you retroactively make my probation have ended earlier?”

If I had to do it again, which I’m trying my damnedest not to, I would’ve gotten my lawyer or called myself to find a definitive date that my probation was over. Would’ve had a small little celebration to myself when midnight ticked over on the clock when it happened (not drinking and driving, of course).

The probation you go on for your first DUI (and possibly others) is called “Summary Probation”, which basically means “don’t fuck up or we’ll throw the book at you”. There’s no expensive probation officer, which is probably the first time they let you not have another fee they could charge you. No PO, no checking in, nothing like that. Just don’t mess up.

Additionally you can't refuse a field sobriety test, and your odds of getting picked at a DUI checkpoint raise if they're checking plates (although I cruised through two, sober, without being tested).

So what is messing up?

Some people believe it’s committing any crime, but that’s not quite it. My lawyer told me that he had somebody arrested for shoplifting while on DUI probation and the court didn’t care, didn’t consider it a violation. (Update: I have been told in other states that this will trigger a violation, so best to keep clean as a whistle) While this blog does not condone shoplifting or any other crimes in any way whatsoever, you should know what scrutiny you’re under.

This probation deals with alcohol and driving - basically you can’t get caught with even a drop of alcohol in your blood when you’re driving or else you’ll face some consequences (and remember, you can't refuse a test). The common thing to say is that it’s another DUI even if you’re at .0001, but that’s not true either. They can only give you a DUI if you’re over .08 (.05 now in some places), otherwise it’s “just” a probation violation, which means more school, more money paid, more probation. If you’re above .08 you get a DUI on top of that. Not good.

Other traffic infractions are fine. This I can verify personally - I did receive a parking ticket, and an out-of-state speeding ticket (14 over on the highway, bullshit speed trap), and neither affected my probation or caused any additional consequences (and yes, I was sweating bullets when pulled over on that highway and very worried about if this counts as a violation. Next rest stop I did a lot of googling until I calmed down enough to continue on my trip.)

Any sort of aggravated driving, road rage, that sort of thing takes you into the “maybe” territory. It’s all up to a judge and the system, and by this point you know how it goes. If they can, they usually will. You might catch a break, probably not, depends on a lot of things out of your control, and how you handle yourself around them. Bottom line: I wouldn’t depend on anything.

Your Summary Probation basically comes down to two tenets:
  1. Don’t drink and drive
  2. Don’t be an asshole.

Seems easy enough. But three years is a long, long time. It gets harder and harder the longer you are from your DUI. Drinks after work, wine with a meal, beer at a ballgame. The temptations are everywhere. And if you’re like me, and haven’t quit drinking, you’ll eventually indulge yourself.

“A beer or two won’t hurt, not like I’m getting drunk, not like that night”

And then you wait a little bit, don’t get ‘one more for the road’, call it early.

And then you get in your car, and you head home. With just a little bit in your system. Nothing too bad, just a little bit.

And then a cop gets behind you.

And then you start sweating, worrying. Praying that your tail light is working, making sure your seat belt is fastened tight.

And the cop keeps following you, and you start worrying if he is playing games with you, you’re worrying that he somehow knows that you’re in violation.

You turn off the radio, you pay the best attention you can, and then eventually the cop turns down another road, and you let out a big sigh of relief.

Then two weeks later your friend asks you to happy hour.

And you start to sweat again, and think about what could happen.

This is what it’s like. It’s easy in that you don’t really have to do anything except not mess up. It’s hard in that our society practically pushes people to drink and drive. Odds are you’re reading this because you went to a social function, or did something that we’re told is how you relax. You felt fine because we don’t teach people how alcohol affects the body and it’s impossible to “feel” what your BAC level is. We make fun of people who use breathalyzers, and everyone condemns drinking and driving but nearly everyone does it.

You’re going to find yourself in a lot of situations where you will be tempted to violate your probation. I suggest knowing your BAC by using a portable breathalyzer, or taking an Uber or Lyft.

Looking over your shoulder for cops all the time sucks.

Some lawyers will offer you a service to where they can reduce your probation, usually take off the third year. I didn’t go for this, they wanted a thousand dollars for it, and I’d spent enough. Instead, I went through the whole thing. The theory is they cite your fulfilling all your commitments and use your two years (one and a half in some cases) of not violating probation as evidence that you won’t violate it for the next. Works some times, doesn’t work others. I decided to stick it out, a thousand dollars buys a lot of Lyfts, and I can refuse one last round and wait it out.

And so I did.

And now I’m free.

Reader, I can’t tell you how good it feels to be free of the system to come this far. Now I just have to get past the 3-year anniversary of finalizing my suspension to get my insurance rates to fall to normal and then… it’s all behind me.

The journey is long, and it’s hard, but just take it one step at a time, and you can get through it. It costs a lot, and it takes up a lot of time, but you can get through it.

You can Survive a DUI.

Guest Post: Ways to Challenge Breathalyzer Test

I received an email via my contact page from John Adam, who wanted to wanted to give some perspective on how to challenge the Breathalyzer test. Interesting stuff - Tom

The use of breath to determine the blood alcohol level of a person is the most popular scientific method in DUI cases. There are many cases, when the wrong Breathalyzer tests cause the person, under suspicion of driving while drinking, face DUI charges. Breathalyzer results are inaccurate because of certain problems with calibrations or if there is an untrained police officer using the device.

The prosecuting party has to prove in the court that the defendant's BAC was at or above the legal limit. In a few states, it is .10% while in others it is .08%. When the person is wrongfully charged on the basis of defective Breathalyzer tests, the defendant needs a DUI attorney to challenge the Breathalyzer test in court.

The Burden of Proof in Challenging the Results:


Under the wrongful DUI charges, the defendant must prove that these charges are invalid for the conviction. This is possible when the attorney convinces the court that there is a lack of strength in evidence or it is insufficient to convict the accused. The defense team may focus on the witness statement and evidence without having the burden of proof. When the defense refutes the proof and demonstrates that the prosecution has not strengthened in the case, this may help in dismissing the
charges.

Use of Breathalyzer:


There are many cases when the Breathalyzer is not used properly. The police officer uses the device inaccurately given improper maintenance, training or calibration, which gives the inaccurate results. When the prosecuting party has Breathalyzer results as the only evidence, by only refuting this proof it becomes easy as well as effective to defend the person from the conviction. However, in this case, the defense team needs the help of an expert in these devices or understands well the proper calibration to give accurate results.

Training of the Police Officer:


In many cases, the police officer who pulls over the driver on suspicion of being under the influence of drug or alcohol, may not be properly trained to conduct a Breathalyzer test or use the device. The device cannot provide the results if the officer does not use it accurately. There are certain rules for this such as observing the driver for twenty minutes to determine whether the results are accurate or not. Moreover, the office is supposed to check the intestinal health of the accused or alcohol in the mouth.

Calibration:


Breathalyzers have settings as well as calibrations that need regular maintenance and understanding. In case the officer in charge is unaware of how to set the device and keeps it maintained, the device can produce the wrong results.

Few devices need to be repaired and parts replaced. In case of lack of knowledge about taking care of the device, there will be inaccurate results leading to wrong DUI charges. Not only one, but all or most of the arrest will be affected.

Challenging the Results Varies According to the Case:


In addition to the above-mentioned ways, there are other ways to challenge the Breathalyzer tests. For instance, the accused may have a special condition that could lead to the retention of the alcohol in his or her system that brings wrong results. This is another effective to challenge the results and refute the charges completely.

Other factors involved, the environmental temperature and pressure in the atmosphere, and the chemical composition of the person taking the test. This refers to the emotional stress and physical activity, hyperventilating, heavy breathing due to anxiousness.

Given these several factors, the results are inaccurately measured. This is the reason few of the DUI cases involve expert witness who gives the testimony about the inaccuracy of the device with incorrect results. The DUI attorney must present the valid argument based upon these facts and evidence.

Final Word:


The defendant needs the support of the lawyer to challenge the Breathalyzer tests, as the attorney is skilled in dealing with such cases and will guide according to the given circumstances.

Guest Post: How often are DUI cases expunged in California?

Robert Miller reached out to me to share a bit about the expungement process. It's not a part of gotten to yet (I'm still on my probation) but hope to do someday. Valuable information that I have found very useful in the hope of moving on. Hopefully Robert will help me out when the time comes. - Tom.

How often are DUI cases expunged in California?



dui criminal background check

If you have been convicted of a DUI, clearing your record is a worthy goal that most people will have. An expungement of a California DUI would help clear your criminal record. So you may wonder how often DUI cases are expunged in California.

As it becomes easier and easier for potentially employers to obtain digital records of convictions, and as the job market makes job applications more competitive, it is easier and easier for employers to screen out the candidates with a criminal record, which leaves those with a DUI with less and less available jobs to even compete for. For those reasons, if you have a DUI on your record, expunging it from your record is something you would want to accomplish as rapidly as possible.

What exactly is on my record after a DUI?


It’s important to realize that when speaking about a “record”, that in California, after a DUI conviction you actually have two different records that your DUI shows up on.

The first is your criminal record.


A criminal record will show your arrest, the case number, and the sentence (or what is called the “disposition” on a criminal record).

The second is the driving record.


The driving record will show points from a DUI conviction, whether a wet reckless or a DUI, or any accident or other related traffic tickets. Any alcohol related conviction will show as a notification on your driving record, and will show the date of offense, the date of conviction, and any DMV actions related to the DUI or alcohol related offense, and the also any filings of an SR22 for insurance purposes.

A criminal conviction stays on your criminal record for life, unless it’s expunged, or pardoned by the Governor of California. It never automatically “drops off”, like items on your credit report. It can only be used against you for purposes of alleging a prior DUI for ten years, but it’s still on your record, even after that ten-year period.

Any driving record notation also stays on your record for life. It can only be used to increase insurance for three years. The points from any tickets, accidents, or court convictions can only be used against you by the DMV for a three-year period to suspend your license. But the DMV keeps track of your lifetime points for their “negligent operator” program, which is used to pull the licenses of the most serious driving offenders. There is no way to expunge your driving record, only your criminal record.

What exactly is an expungement in California?


An expungement is a motion to the court that, once granted, retroactively dismisses your case from your criminal record. There are some things that by law, an expungement cannot help you with, namely preventing criminal charges for priors for future crimes, getting federal or state licenses, or contracting with the state or federal government.

How does someone qualify for an expungement of a DUI?


In order to get an expungement order granted, you need to first bring the motion. Most counties in California have a court form available online for applying for an expungement, and in addition to the form motion, you must also provide the order for the judge to sign (California has a form for these, Forms CR-180 & CR-181). A copy of your motion must also be mailed or delivered in person to the prosecutor.

You also must meet three requirements in order to get an expungement:

  1. You must be off probation. Either probation must have expired, or you must bring a motion to terminate probation early first.
  2. You must have completed all the terms of your sentence. The court will look at your court file and make sure that all fines are paid, all alcohol schools are completed, and any community service, or special classes or punishment have been finished.
  3. You must not have any other cases pending, and you must not have any convictions after the conviction you are seeking to expunge. Any convictions would be a probation violation.

What does California law state about an expungement?
California’s expungement law, Penal Code 1203.4(a)(1) states:

In any case in which a defendant has fulfilled the conditions of probation for the entire period of probation, or has been discharged prior to the termination of the period of probation, or in any other case in which a court, in its discretion and the interests of justice, determines that a defendant should be granted the relief available under this section, the defendant shall, at any time after the termination of the period of probation, if he or she is not then serving a sentence for any offense, on probation for any offense, or charged with the commission of any offense, be permitted by the court to withdraw his or her plea of guilty or plea of nolo contendere and enter a plea of not guilty; or, if he or she has been convicted after a plea of not guilty, the court shall set aside the verdict of guilty; and, in either case, the court shall thereupon dismiss the accusations or information against the defendant and except as noted below, he or she shall thereafter be released from all penalties and disabilities resulting from the offense of which he or she has been convicted, except as provided in Section 13555 of the Vehicle Code.” (Emphasis added)

So, how often are DUI cases expunged in California?


I have bolded the sections of the law that state “shall” in the law above, because those are truly unusual in law. In most cases, and in most laws, the law explicitly gives a judge a decision to make, by stating that the judge “may, in his or her discretion”.

The expungement law is different because the use of the term “shall” means that the judge doesn’t have that discretion. As long as the person seeking an expungement meets the three requirements above, the judge has to grant the expungement petition.

As a result, a high rate of DUI cases are expunged. The only way to not get an expungement is either to not qualify by not meeting one of the three requirements above, or to not apply for one at all.

Author: This article was written by Robert Miller, an Orange County DUI Lawyer at the law firm of Miller & Associates in Newport Beach, California.

Guest Post: Both Sides

I received an email via my contact page from David, who has seen both sides of receiving a DUI/DWI, both as an offender and as a victim. It's a really great perspective on everything we face. While this site does try to help get people through their DUI experiences, we do not endorse drinking and driving, and hope that everybody who goes through it learns their lesson and does not have a repeat offense. Thanks to David for this article, it was a harrowing read. - Tom.

My name is David. I am both a DWI offender and a victim of a DWI crash.

My DWI


Years ago, I had a bunch beers while enjoying a summer weekend with friends: I don't remember the exact number but it was at least 4 or 5. I stopped drinking at some point before I knew I had to leave.

I didn't stop soon enough. I didn't know that at the time. I thought I was ok to drive. I had driven home many, many times before in worse shape.

I was about a mile from home when I rear ended another driver at a red light. Fortunately, it was a minor fender bender and neither of us were hurt.

The cops came: I failed field sobriety tests, was arrested and taken to jail. I blew .09 at the station.

I was kept overnight in jail. I didn't sleep. My mind was racing with what might happen. All I could imagine was the worst.

The next morning, I walked home: my car was impounded and undriveable. My house keys were with my car; I had to break into my house.

That was a long, difficult summer and fall. I took the laws seriously: I sold my car after it was repaired. I rode my bike and public transportation every where I needed to go, including court.

I attended the driver responsibility training. During the driver responsibility training, I learned about the rate that alcohol metabolizes. I attended a victim impact panel.

I live in a state next to Canada: I haven't been to Canada since. I plan to request permission to go to Canada again soon.

Since then, I have tried to be responsible about drinking. I have gone long periods without drinking.

Being Hit By a Drunk Driver


Jump ahead a few years: my wife and I went out to dinner with one of her friends. We rode our bikes from our house to the restaurant, something we’d done many times before. It was a beautiful, late summer evening and we thoroughly enjoyed the weather and ride.

After dinner, my wife suggested we ride down to the waterfront. We had done so dozens of times before: it seemed perfectly safe.

We rode about 100 feet when it happened: we were hit. My wife and I were riding single file. She was riding behind me and the drunk driver hit her first. He hit me immediately after her.

Neither of us had any clue what happened. One moment we're riding our bikes, the next, we were flat on our backs, on the road. We were thrown from our bikes on to the road.

I couldn't move but I tried to pull myself up. I must have been unconscious briefly because someone was already with me and told me to lay still. I didn't know where my wife was or if anything had happened to her. I didn’t really know what was going on around me: I tunnel vision that limited what I saw and experienced.

Meanwhile, the driver who hit us took off. My bike was under the front of his SUV. He stopped after about 500', got out of his SUV and tried to pull my bike out from under his car.

By that time, people running after his car caught up to him. Moments later, the police showed up. He refused the breath test and was arrested.

An ambulance showed up and took me to the local emergency room. When I was unloaded, I heard the emergency room personnel say that one of us would go in one room and I to another. It was at that point I realized my wife was hurt. I didn't know just how badly she was until later that night.

We were hit around 9:45pm. I spent the entire night in an emergency room, wide awake.

Around 11pm, a police officer came to ask me if I knew what happened. I had no clue, so he filled in the details. And he told me what had happened to my wife: she had a broken leg, fractured ribs, fractured vertebrae and a broken collarbone.

I was a lot more fortunate: mostly scrapes and bruises. My back was torn up from landing and sliding on the road. Because of that, I didn't see a doctor until about 6am.

When the doctor released me, I couldn't walk. The trauma of being hit took its toll on me. The doctor gave me a cane and sent me on my way. I mustered all of my strength and, quite literally, dragged myself to my wife's room.

When I finally got there, I was never so happy to see someone in my life. She was battered and clearly injured but she was alive.

My wife had surgery to fix her leg later that day. Doctors put a rod in her leg to put it back together. That sounds like a simple thing but in reality, it is a very violent surgery. The rod has to be hammered in. Go look up inter medullary rod surgery on YouTube. There are plenty of videos showing how it's done.

My wife stayed on the surgery floor for for a couple days and was then transferred to the rehab floor.

She spent two weeks in rehab, learning how to walk again, how to get out of bed. When you are hurt that badly, your body shuts down. Nurses get you out of bed to go to the bathroom... after they take your catheter out. You have no independence: you have to retrain your body to do basic functions.

Over the course of two weeks, my wife progressed from not being able to get out of bed to a wheelchair to a walker and finally to a cane. She was released from the hospital wearing a cervical collar, which she had to wear another 12 weeks.

She lost her independence during that time. She could not drive. Me, my family, our friends took her to the many follow up appointments. She had to go to physical therapy for weeks afterwards.

While my wife was being put back together in the hospital, getting rehab, trying to recover from this incredibly violent assault, the driver was at home, sleeping in his own bed. Going about his daily life.

While she was in the hospital, I struggled through daily existence. I couldn't walk without a cane for several weeks and was dependent on friends to get me to the hospital and back. My wife missed the start of our son’s school year. She missed the start of his soccer season. She didn’t go to the school’s open house.

My mother came to stay with us. She drove me everywhere and, when my wife got out of the hospital, drove her many places.

Slowly, we recovered from our physical injuries. The rod in my wife's leg made it impossible for her to lay on that side and, a year later, she had it removed.

We both have constant reminders of the crash. My wife has scars on her leg from the surgeries. Her collarbone never healed properly. Her doctor told her she faces arthritis in the bones that were injured.

I have scars on my back. I developed tinnitus, probably from hitting my head on the SUV and/or road. I have a constant, high pitched ringing in my ears: it never stops and it never gets better.

Those are the physical scars. My wife didn’t want to ever ride a bike again. She did get back on a bike but she won’t ride anywhere except the neighborhood. We used to enjoy exploring the city, going places, doing things on our bikes. That joy is gone for my wife: every car that passes makes her nervous. She won’t ride at night. That I ride when it’s dark makes my wife very nervous.

After The Crash


After the crash, we had to deal with all sorts of issues.

The person who hit us ran. He left us for dead. Running sends a very strong message to victims about the value of their lives: it says that we are worth nothing. A human would stop, if for no other reason to see if we were ok.

Running makes the driver a monster. It makes him inhuman.

We suddenly got sucked into the insurance system. We live in a no fault state and the hospital and doctors dealt with the insurance company directly for the most part. There was a long, tense period where the insurance company was “deciding” if we shared any responsibility (we didn’t).

We wondered if there were going to be medical bills not covered by the insurance. We worried about how we would have to pay those if it happened.

We also got sucked into the criminal justice system. A victim advocate and the district attorney came to see us in the hospital. We were, to say the least, skeptical about what would happen.

The person who hit us was charged with a variety of things. It wasn’t his first DWI, either: he had a prior DWI conviction 7 years earlier that resulted in a 3 year probation. Clearly, he didn’t learn anything from that experience.

By the time we got to the arraignment (yes, victims can and will attend your arraignment), the driver had agreed to plead guilt to the top offense (hitting and injuring my wife while intoxicated). No one ever came right out and told us but the other charges were dropped. The driver was not prosecuted for hitting me.

We had to wait months while the criminal justice system did what they needed to do: talk to the driver, write sentencing recommendation reports et cetera. When it came time for sentencing, we were given the opportunity to make statements to the court. We were also encouraged to gather statements from our family members and friends about the impact on them (more on that below). In our statements, we could ask the judge to give a certain sentence.

The driver who hit us faced a maximum sentence of 3 years in prison. The sentencing guidelines in our state aren’t great, from a victim’s standpoint. For the crime, any given sentence seems like a joke.

My wife and I both read statements we’d prepared. We asked the judge for a split sentence: some jail time and five years of probation. We wanted the driver under close supervision for the maximum amount of time. A prison sentence might have been more punitive in the short term but would have, overall, resulted in less supervised time.

The judge was surprised by our request but understood the logic and agreed to it. He also made it abundantly clear to the driver that, if he violated probation, he would sentence the driver the maximum he could.

The driver and his lawyer attempted to show the judge he had started to turn his life around. He may have tried to apologize, I don’t know. I don’t recall anything that sounded even remotely like a sincere apology.

I mentioned the impact on our families above. One of the things you have to when something like this happens is tell everyone in your family before they find out some other way. We were lucky in that respect: our families didn’t have police officers showing up to tell them we were dead.

Almost all our family members live far away: my wife’s dad lives at the other end of the state. My dad lives in the south; my mom was in an airport somewhere. My wife’s brother lives overseas. Only my sister lives in town.

I had to call my wife’s father and tell him what happened and that we were ok. I couldn’t reach my mother: I had to message her through Facebook. Same thing for my dad.

I had no idea how to reach my wife’s brother: I’d never called him. So I took her phone and texted him. I wasn’t thinking about how any of these people would receive the message: I just needed to tell them as quickly as possible.

It wasn’t until months later that I found out about the impact of those messages. My wife’s brother said (in his impact statement): “I chat online with (my sister) quite frequently. Seeing her name popup in the message list on my mobile phone is a regular event. I know, when I see her name, that I am communicating with my sister. However, on the afternoon (after the crash), I received a very disturbing message. The message was delivered from Roberta's mobile phone, however it was made quite clear from the onset that it wasn't my sister who was writing.”

“Seeing that someone very close to my sister, but not my sister herself, was writing to me from her phone sent an immediate and shocking chill through my body. My immediate fear was that my sister had died somehow, and this was the method by which I would receive the news. He ultimately told me they were both alive and will survive, but I will never forget that cold chill shock. I will never forget that moment of feeling that I might have just lost my sister forever.”

I choke up and tears come to my eyes every time I read that. It chills me to the core: I don’t want anything like what happened to us to happen to any of my friends or family members.

The driver received a split sentence. He served his jail time and is currently service his probation. He wore an ankle monitor for six months or so. While he’s on probation, he must live under a long list of restrictions. He can’t leave the county. He can’t go anyplace (restaurant, bar) that serves alcohol (that includes Chucky Cheese). He faces random inspections. There can’t be any alcohol where he lives.

If the DMV agrees to let him have his license back (an uncertainty considering the prior DWI and the violence of the 2nd), he’ll have to put (and pay for) an interlock in every car he has access to in his household.

He has a felony conviction, which makes certain job opportunities unavailable to him.

We understand he paid his lawyers $10,000. For two court appearances. Actually, he didn’t pay it: a family friend did. I assume he has to pay it back.

Final Thoughts


As part of the civil side of a DWI crash, your victims will find out a lot about you. We found out the driver who hit us had declared bankruptcy and had tens of thousands of dollars of outstanding debts. He didn’t have any assets.

You might want to think about that if you’ve had one DWI. The reason a victim’s lawyer looks into your assets is to see what can be recovered for the victim.

We were fortunate that the driver who hit us carried reasonable insurance coverage. It covered all our medical expenses. There are limits to the coverage, however. That largest number (bodily injury liability) is a policy limit: all victims split it. So, if you have $300,000 (which is common), that’s the max the insurance company will pay out to all victims, combined. If those victims obtain a judgement against you, the balance comes from your assets.

The penalties for DWI, especially for a DWI that doesn’t involve other victims, can seem harsh. To the victim, they seem laughable. Having been both, I understand the point: they are intended to deter drivers from repeat DWIs. In our part of the state, all DWI drivers have to attend driver responsibility training and a victim impact panel.

At the victim impact panel, people like my wife and I, and other people, who’ve lost children, husbands, wives, parents, tell their story. They talk about the impact it had on their lives. We have a couple of people who’ve had multiple DWIs and made victims of themselves who present.

It is a terrible club to be in. Everyone there is because of heartbreak. For the victims, it doesn’t ever get better. There is not a day that goes by when we don’t think about what happened, what someone else did to us.

And in so doing, how cheaply they did it. How little value they place on our lives. We know our lives could have been, the lives of loved ones were, taken away for a few drinks.

Depending on where you live, the recidivism rate is somewhere between 11 and 69%. A DWI arrest is a predictor of another arrest. And, from what I’ve learned, the 2nd and later offenses will be worse. It is not a matter of whether you will be involved in a crash, just a matter of time.

Every one of the victims I present with has the same message: we don’t care if you drink. If you have a problem, we want you to get help. But if you want to drink socially, we’re not trying to discourage you. We just want you to do everything you can to stop yourself from drinking and driving. We want you to have a plan and to stick to it: once you’ve started drinking, your decision making ability is impaired and you will not make the right decision.